Making the Best of a Cliquey Situation


For too many bloggers these days, having to deal with blogging cliques is a common occurrence. A lot of the times, we tend to take it personally. We think we’re not good enough or we aren’t a proper blogger. Difficult experiences are a part of life, but it shouldn’t bring you down. Learn how to deal with the unfortunate parts of blogging.

What are blogging cliques?

We all have blogging friends. It’s an essential part of connecting and growing your blog. However, a clique is more than just a group of friends. A clique can become negative, exclude others, and portray a superior air. In bad cases, they can attack other bloggers (verbally) and go on a social smear campaign.

How should I react to blogging cliques?

The key is not to react. If someone is attacking or bullying you, don’t feed into it. These types want a reaction. Learn to rise above and not play into their drama. Most of these times, this is a form of entertainment for these groups. You deserve respect! Be the bigger person.

How do I make sure my blogging group doesn’t turn into a clique?

Do you have a blogging group in your area? Do you have a group of blogging friends you always meet up with at events? If so, you should be aware of how you can be perceived. If you’re at an event, you should always mingle, socialize, and network. Don’t just stay within your group. Although this can be hard, especially those shy types, it’s important to meet others. If you just stay within your group, others may think you are an exclusive or unfriendly group. This goes along with socializing, but be friendly! Give other bloggers your attention and respect.

Don’t play into drama or gossiping. In our culture, we know anything and everything about celebrities. We feel free to pass judgment and gossip for entertainment. We feel that these celebrities aren’t real people, so we use them as subjects of conversation. The same goes with bloggers. “Did you see what she was wearing?” “Did you hear what they did?” “Her hair/outfit/makeup looks horrible!” These are all comments I’ve overheard at blogging conferences and events. Use the golden rule. Would you want someone talking about you that way?

Let’s keep blogging friendly! It’s an amazing way to connect with others that have similar interests. You can make lifelong friends, gain amazing industry experience, and have opportunities you would have never imagined. Everyone deserves a chance. We all work extremely hard on our blogs and pride ourselves on our content. Although there are countless bloggers out there, the blogging community as a whole is pretty small.  Word can get around fast about any type of bad behavior or negative experiences. Let’s just say you don’t want to be on that side of things. Just focus on the positive and your potential blog growth and you’ll be just fine!

So tell us. Have you ever had a difficult blogging clique experience?

10 Comments on Making the Best of a Cliquey Situation

  1. Kaitlyn Pierce
    May 18, 2012 at 11:27 am (7 years ago)

    Love this post! Cliques are a major reason I started Blog Trends. I wanted a place that was a level playing field and everyone was encouraged to be themselves and not feel insecure about experience. Thanks for the great post!

  2. tr!na
    May 18, 2012 at 12:33 pm (7 years ago)

    I’m lucky I’ve never encountered this, but I have witnessed it. You’re exactly right, though. Feeding this monster is the LAST thing you want to do. So I silently observe and make my escape. I highly dislike cliques and it’s sad how these people feel the need to behave in such a way. Blog Trends has become my all time favorite community when it comes to blogging, because even though I don’t know how to accessorize or put on eye shadow correctly, you don’t judge. You inspire and educate. THAT is awesome!

  3. Aprill
    May 18, 2012 at 1:42 pm (7 years ago)

    I have no experience with cliques and my knowledge of them is very limited. In about 10 days, it will be 2 years that I have been doing this. I entered alone, I accept responsibility alone, and I will quit one day, alone. It is nice to communicate with like minded people that can understand what you do, and what you are going through etc from time to time, but that is nearly impossible to do with every blogger that crosses my path.

    Veteran bloggers that have been doing this for years cannot relate to my struggles. Chances are, they dont even remember. Understand that things were very different 5 years ago (I will not elaborate). So why not find like minded people and grow with them? Focus changes- I ran a group alone for a very short period of time and it is VERY hard to manage bloggers that do this for fun and bloggers that do this for business in the same atmosphere.

    I know that I speak from a very pessimistic point of view, but I can tell you from personal experience that I used to have my arms wide open- you help, and you get abused, ran over, used and forgotten. You get tired of it, and you just wanna sit to the side on helping sometimes. I am always here and open and willing to help in some aspects, but in others, yes, there are only certain people that I will do certain things for, and certain things I will do for no one. It’s just best that way. So my best suggestion is to find people like you. That’s how I made my friends. Join a blogging group like this one and jump in! Dont sit on the sidelines and feel like you are being left out. Ask yourself- ‘what actions did I take to attempt to mix with other?’ Dont feel intimidated. Talk! And when all else fails, and you are not being let in the ‘party’, create your own. It never fails.

  4. Ashe @ Ash in Fashion
    May 18, 2012 at 2:14 pm (7 years ago)

    I’ve been accused of being clique-y– which baffled me at the time, because the bloggers they accused me of being clique-y with were people I actually DIDN’T have much contact with at all!

    I personally do try to be friendly and outgoing, communicative and helpful to any blogger who gets in touch with me. Sometimes I may chat more with certain gals–we’ve been around for the same amount of time, have worked together in other projects, etc. So if you feel that you’re THAT girl, all I can say is — keep trying to be positive and be open to everyone!

  5. Francy
    May 21, 2012 at 8:20 pm (7 years ago)

    I think this is a great post! I’m pretty new to blogging and at one of my first blogger events that I attended I found it to be very cliquey. It was disappointing to see that the more veteran bloggers, including the host of the event, did not make much of an effort to interact with the newer, lesser known bloggers. I spoke to some of the other newer bloggers after the event and they also felt the same way. Food for thought, in business school it was pressed upon us that your network is your “net worth”. I think in life it’s best to be friendly and nice to everyone as much as possible because you never know who you might end up meeting that way! Plus, you never want to burn a bridge by being cliquey and or ignoring others! 🙂

  6. Queen in Heels
    May 22, 2012 at 4:14 pm (7 years ago)

    I agree with Francy’s comment. That is all I will say on this very true matter 😉

  7. Kristiina S
    May 23, 2012 at 10:08 am (7 years ago)

    I had this exact experience at my first blogging conference. One thing I learned is that some people can’t have fun unless they are leaving someone out. I made an effort to make friends with attendants who were clearly very shy and ended up having a great time.

  8. Barbara
    May 25, 2012 at 3:23 am (7 years ago)

    I am yet to experience blogger cliques but I guess I can say I have seen a bit of it in action. I went to a bloggers’ event in January (stumbled upon it more like) and even though I had been blogging actively for about 6 months, i didn’t know anyone there and no one knew me. It was as if, since they knew each other already, there was no need to know a new person.

  9. couturepurpose
    August 16, 2012 at 4:39 pm (6 years ago)

    Great post, I find the blog world sometimes mirror what we as women encounter. Cliques, judgment and self-hate are the energies we as women often project towards one another. My intentions with my blog are to deal with these issues while rocking a great pair of stilettos!

  10. delectablychic
    August 18, 2012 at 10:47 am (6 years ago)

    I tend to go to a lot of events in town and see quite a few of the city’s high profile fashion bloggers. While I get the same invitations from PR companies and designers as they do, I don’t think they consider me “one of them” – I’m not exclusively fashion enough. In addition, I consider myself a lifestyle blogger, since DelectablyChic! has pieces on food and travel as well. On the other hand, I don’t really fit in with many lifestyle bloggers – too many of them fall into the “mommy” market and I’m living the DINK (dual income, no kids) lifestyle.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Comment *